Sometimes I can lose my brain. I think it just gets tired and stays on my pillow for the day while my body gets up and starts moving. I thought today was Thursday. Yesterday I knew it was Thursday when I woke up but about halfway through the day I forgot. Then I woke up this morning and thought it was Thursday again. With my days all messed up I forgot to post my Thankful Thursday List. So I’m doing it today. Thursday #2 for me this week.
My hubby and I were talking this week about how this year (which is September to August for us educator peeps) feels like it’s been filled with tragedy. Kids driving too fast, making poor choices. Friends getting sick. Then getting sicker. Parents losing children. Children losing parents. Grief and mourning. Unexplainable. Tragedy after tragedy, marking our community.
In times like these I feel silly thanking the Lord for birds. As though it’s too trivial to mention when lives have been devastated and people are hurting. And then I think about how I’d handle tragedy if it ever knocked on my door and walked in uninvited. I hope I’d know how to cope. I hope I’d be able to continue to move. I hope I’d know that good things still fill our moments and our days and our lives, even in the midst of utter despair. I hope I would have learned in these days of joy and peace how to number goodness and see blessing so that it would come naturally, even in my grief. And so I’ll count, even the trivial, because it is good.
96. Fluttery tiny white butterflies
97. Sun’s glory reflecting off a full moon’s face
98. One more day
99. Brother and sister working together
100. They are children still
101. Heavenly light illuminating evening storm clouds
102. Jumping in puddles
103. Tiny boots dripping wet
104. Rain blown sideways
105. Little Man running down the hall
106. 7 year old arms wrapped around me
107. Nuzzling Little Man’s neck while he giggles
108. Brother’s cuddling while we sing God’s praises
109. Three generations at the dinner table
110. Grandma reading books to my babies
I am reminded every day that gratitude does not come naturally to me. Living thankful for the moment I’m in is something I have to practice. But as the days and weeks pass, though I still have to remind myself to be thankful for each moment, the attitude of thankfulness is invading my life. I am yelling less. I am angry less. I am affected less by circumstance. I am better able to trust because each moment I offer my gratitude for is an alter I build to remember God’s goodness. I pray that my life will be littered with these piles of rock, these altars to the Giver of good things.