There has been a lot going on around here lately. The start of school, getting settled in our new home, and a round of the flu to be exact. Everyone in our house but the hubby got it, for a week each. So we are just getting used to having a week where everyone is healthy and no one needs to be given tylenol every time you turn around. And now fall is here, complete with changing leaves, pumpkins and the beginning of another holiday season. We’ve got birthdays coming up and gymnastics and we (and by we I mean me) are furiously making Christmas presents so we don’t add to the landfills, support the consumerism of America and give people stuff, stuff and more stuff. Classroom volunteering starts in October, as does the countdown to my sister’s due date. I think I need to figure out composting while the leaves are falling, as I hear they have a great deal to do with good dirt. AND we have loads of projects to do around our new house.
So you just read that list, are you tired yet?
Needless to say, I am having trouble wrapping my head around life and concentrating on things that are important. Our church is doing ann alignment series right now (by the way, I despise that term…but I may rant about that later). We are all studying the same thing in bible studies, home groups, Sunday morning, high school ministry, etc… Let’s just say, I’m finding it hard to be aligned. I am in a place of personal unsettledness right now, and that usually brings out my cynicism and questioning. I feel as though I should be doing more or have more of a purpose, but everything around me seems so “Ecclesiastes”. Meaningless. Pointless. I know what my heart is drawn towards, what it beats for, what it breaks for…but life as I see it around me has nothing to do with that. And I find myself asking, “Am I being let towards a new thing? Do you have something more for me?” But, alas, no answer yet. Just another day of unsettled soul angst living here in my American luxury, drinking my Starbucks and driving my kid to free public school in my 7 passenger vehicle with warm clothes, a full stomach and a head swimming in questions.
And as life continues to move and time continues to march on here I hear the sounds of a baby who needs his mamma and notice that I need to jump into my 7 passenger vehicle once again to drive down the paved streets and pick up my son from school.
More to come on this unsettledness…